Dear Future Spouse: Look This Way

It feels as if there are a lot of people out there that have not thought about their futures nearly as carefully or hopefully or simply fully as this young man. I came across this article during a late night Facebook scrolling-spree and couldn’t pass up the poetic truth it possesses. It was a pleasure to follow his path through marriage, children, and retirement in only a few short paragraphs and also to feel the faith that I hope I can one day share with a spouse as well.

Originally posted on the Odessey:

I’m writing to you at 19. I don’t know how many 19-year-old guys can truthfully say that they’ve been thinking about their future wife for 11 years, but I sure have. Imagining is sort of my thing, and I do it all the time. I’ve had a lot of time to think about what we’ll be like, and I’ve looked for you in some pretty strange places. I don’t know if I know you yet, but I guess that doesn’t matter. I’ve learned that when looking for something, the mindset one has affects what he finds. So, take a second to look this way.

Look up. Look this way towards God when things are going wrong. Instead of looking around for the world to help, look up for ultimate happiness. I know life is going to throw us curve balls, and no one has a perfect batting average. When you’re depressed, stressed, scared, nervous, insecure, or any other negative emotion, please look up. Of course, I’ll do my best to help you avoid any unpleasant feeling, but God can do that better than I can. Luckily, He will be our team captain.

Look ahead. Look this way when we learn about each other’s mistakes. Everyone has the past, but it isn’t our place to judge. If the perfect Jesus can forgive, then we sure can as well. I realize that everything that happens to us is meant to push us in the right direction, and everyone takes a different way. I’m not going to question why God put you on the path He did, and I hope you feel the same. Go ahead, tell me your darkest secrets and worst moments, I promise I’ll love you through them. The best is yet to come.

Look at me. Look this way whenever you want. When we’re standing at the alter. When we’re dancing around the new house we just bought. When I’m doing something embarrassing in public. Look at me. You signed up for all of my mess, and I’m so grateful. I promise that when you look at me, you’ll see so much adoration in my eyes. Look at me because I’ll sure be looking at you.

Look down. Look this way when our children pull on your pants leg. I hope you want little ones as much as I do. When they pull on your leg and look up at you with wonder in their eyes, look down. Help them tie their shoes. Brush the dirt off their faces. Wipe the tears from their eyes. I’m excited to get to be a parent with you, and I’m very thankful at how great of a mother you’ll be. I’ll definitely need a lot of help.

Look around. Look this way when we are sitting at the dinner table with our little family. After a stressful week at work, look around at everything God has blessed us with. Give thanks. No matter what our life looks like, look around at it and be joyful. I’m imagining you, a few kids, dogs, maybe a cat or two and who knows what else. That sounds like a pretty picture to me.

Look back. Look this way when we’re old and sitting on our porch together reflecting on our life. We’ll talk about how well we did and how much fun it was. Look back on everything we did together, and have no regrets. I’m willing to take on anything with you by my side. Let’s buckle up and make the most of this ride.

Life isn’t going to be perfect just because we know a perfect God. Chaos and madness will be thrown at us every day. Difficulties are guaranteed. I hope that when we feel as if life has knocked us off our feet, we get up on our knees, and we pray. This life will be an interesting one. We’ll take the time to look at everything along the way. Dear future wife, look this way.

This article was originally written by Jacob Grell on March 28, 2016.

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